C. J. Daley

Huge thanks to Shortwave for a physical copy of this one to review. I have to say, it’s simple, but this is one of my favorite covers from them.

A couple gets a little lost, so when they come across a bar, they figure why not stop for a beer? They’re already a bit behind, and it’s just going to be one, right? What follows will go down as one of their worst nights…ever.

This is a first read for me by the author. I have a hardcover of Boys in the Valley, it was on my desired October TBR, but I just didn’t fit it in. As I enjoyed this, this may actually function as a really nice introduction to the author for people. It’s short, concise, spooky, kooky even. There’s humor and ridiculousness thrown in that makes it something you can laugh at, while also sidestepping all jukeboxes for the foreseeable future.

Some well done eeriness in such few pages, and a bit of revenge thrown in there as well. Kind of reminded me of something you could see on The Twilight Zone or Black Mirror, especially in its almost episodic length. Check this one out, and as ever, support Shortwave Media.

As soon as I saw this was available, I immediately grabbed a copy and started reading it. Christmas horror is 100% my style this year.

This was a lot darker than I expected from the blurb to be honest. I expected a fast paced home invasion story, and instead I got a ghost story featuring kidnapping, infatuation, absolute control, and conditional love. Mam is not like other mothers. Angelina is constantly watching out so as not to upset her, because at best, she’ll be berated, and at worst…well she doesn’t want to know.

This really broke down and showed the different ways a parent can be over the top controlling. One of my WIP actually features the same type of control, and this was done well enough that I was definitely taking notes. The conditional love was so strongly written and revolting that it made my stomach turn just reading through it.

This was definitely a very Christmasy story, and just about as dark as you can go. Personally a 4/5* for me.

I knew as soon as this book opened with an exorcist putting bullets in a mason jar of holy water, it was going to be a good one. 
I'll start with the height of this book...this book spooked me legitimately! Which hasn't happened since I read Home Before Dark by Riley Sager. Again, just a good mixture a things going on and the book got me. Was I looking over my shoulder in the dark? Yes, I was. Damn basement laundry rooms... 
When the Hill family moves into their recently renovated country home, they expected some peaceful time off before flipping the house for a profit. What they got instead, was demonic presences, evil spirits, and possession. Oh and evil fog, humidity, and funky smells. Body horror and disfigurement. 
The author does some cool references/Easter eggs. For the new family he kept saying the Hill's house, which I took as a possible ‘The Haunting of Hill House' nod.  There's also the obvious name for the exorcist, Merle Blatty, which is a nod to the author of ‘The Exorcist' William Peter Blatty. 
My favorite part of the novel was the way it was narrated. The production did some really cool things the narrators voice. They changed the octaves lower and higher for some of the demonic stuff and it was really good. 
Personally a 5/5*. 

The Autobiography of Santa Claus as told to: Jeff Guinn. Guinn is known as a great biographer, and as this actually reads like it's a real biography, I'll give him that. However if this was really at all enjoyable, than I would have had it finished before Christmas. This dragged. It spent an unbelievable amount of time in the “pre-Santa” timeframe and it cuts out right when it's getting good. I think I've always personally looked at Santa Claus as an aside to Christianity, or like Christmas' capitalism cousin. But this biography really doubles down on Santa, or “Saint Nicholas” really really being tied to Christ. Which is fine really, that's not what I disliked overall anyway. But what I find the most disturbing here is the gross misrepresentation of world history. Whereas Santa Claus is mostly known as mystical or magical and therefore whimsical and silly, this is written as a TRUE story and biographical piece and therefore it is truly adult. Therefore, I cannot forgive the way history is told. Instead of elves, Santa recruits real people. These people are hardly ever nobodies and the book just reads like a weird, and stupid name-drop piece. Not to mention his choices aren't even saintly people or good people? One of them is Attila the Hun?? Also at one point the good Christian St. Nick calls Charlemagne a “good and just leader” and didn't he drown hundreds of thousands of people for not converting? The onus is not on you Santa to support Christians who are bad... To me it just read as a really weird, misleading story rather than an uplifting and whimsical one. Which is honestly, all Santa Claus ought to be. 

Personally, I did not like this, and the closest I've been to a DNF in a long time. 

Poirot Investigates Shorts:



The Adventure of “The Western Star”: 4I feel like this story felt the most whole out of all the short stories I've read so far. It felt like it was building the entire time and not just a random short story that was more just an idea, but was later published. I could have done with less stereotyping of “Chinamen,” but it was published in 1923...I love how this story sets up Captain Hastings being in the right for once, just to later disprove him, making him the stupid one once more. What a brilliant literary tool he is. The Tragedy At Marsdon Manor: 4

I liked that this story decided to go down the road of spookiness for a second there. Calling Mrs. Maltravers mediumistic and asking about séances and hauntings. For a second I really thought there was something supernatural going on, but I guess I should have known better. A little twist, but I enjoyed it.

“You did not observe them, Hastings? No? As I always tell you, you see nothing!” And this right here sums up Hastings in a nutshell...



The Adventure of the Cheap Flat: 3I liked how this story started with just Hastings and the people make him feel good about himself. He even gets in a good Sherlock and Watson reference, not know that he himself is worse than even Watson. Otherwise I think this story was incredibly short and didn't really make a lot of sense. Without the lengthy explanation from Poirot we're just left to believe his little blurb about it without more The Mystery of Hunter's Lodge: 4

“Rather the case of the cart without the horse, you being here without him, isn't it?” Japp dishes out the perfect summary for us. Captain Hastings finally gets an outing all on his own while Poirot is in bed with influenza. Once I saw that Poirot required him to contact him with details daily I realized he was done for. I was a little more surprised that Japp was also entirely wrong, but here we are again with Hercule Poirot being the smartest while half-dead with sick.



The Million Dollar Band Robbery: 3Honestly I was originally really excited to read this one because I read a review on goodreads that said that Poirot solved the case without even leaving his armchair. Unfortunately that just is not the case, he certainly does leave it, and he does a deal of traveling and lunching while solving this case as well. The Mystery of Hunter's Lodge is a story where Poirot is sick and solves a case from home while Hastings is on scene, so maybe they confused them? Regardless, this is a short, fun, run-of-the-mill Poirot short. The Adventure of the Egyptian Tomb: 3

“You misunderstood me, Hastings. What I meant was that I believe in the terrific force of superstition.” Christie once again tears my heart out by toying with supernatural stories and then taking them away right at the end through Poirot's reason. I find these stories to have the power to be the spookiest and I hope throughout them every time even though I should know what's coming.



The Jewel Robbery at the Grand Metropolitan: 3Not a bad short story, the crime and solving were interesting enough, however it was hurt by being what it is—short. I liked the idea that Poirot is so well established now that even when Hastings takes him on a weekend get away he's immediately recognized and needed to solve a crime. Also, I'm pretty sure Christie remarks that Hastings “knows nothing” in every single short story she writes. Captain Hastings is the precursor to Jon Snow The Kidnapped Prime Minister: 3

Strange that this one is later in the book because when he is approached by the UK government he asks why they are looking for his help because he is “unknown in London.” Unless he simply means in the sense that government agents would have taken notice?

At least in this short story Poirot is assigned two additional helpers, so Hastings lack of understanding is actually due to his (mostly) being uninformed and uninvolved. However, this story really did grab me as being just a giant red herring with the trip to France and the lack on involvement of Hastings. Without constant interjections from Poirot, the reader only has the information provided by Hastings, which is NEVER good. It was harder to believe this way and luckily it was short.



The Disappearance of Mr. Davenheim: 3I believe this is the story someone confused with ‘The Million Dollar Bank Robbery' because I saw a review saying he solves a crime without leaving his armchair and obviously that is this story instead. Poirot makes a bet with Japp that he can solve the case without leaving... although this includes updates from Japp and he is allowed to ask for things (pretty much the same as being there...???). I liked how both Poirot and Japp thought it was like stealing from a child from their POV with the bet. Otherwise it was as silly and ridiculous as most of the other short stories, but enjoyable nonetheless. The Adventure of the Italian Nobleman: 4

“Endeavour to have the common sense.” “Never, never will you use the brains the good God has given you.” Hastings is a punching bag I don't know why he sticks around.

I liked how this one started with Captain Hastings recounting how their neighbor, a doctor, liked to stop by for intelligent conversation with Poirot. Even he himself doesn't realize he's an idiot by design. This is one story that is short but sweet. I enjoyed the simple twist as opposed to the many seen in some of the other ones.



The Case of the Missing Will: 4*

I really liked how this one involved a will and for once there was no crime, murder, or police involvement. I feel like overall this was a fitting story/showing for his skill-set, but it still included randomness in the end that we all accept as Poirot's genius...

I think this one was a good ending to her short story book in general because it ended happily, without a murder case, and with Poirot wholeheartedly believing Miss March has earned the money honestly by hiring him.