You Melted Me

Too Much Talking & Exposition Dumping

Okay, so, here's the thing: this is supposed to be dirty but fluffy erotica. But all the action is split up by tons of talking. And I don't mean during foreplay - I mean neither of these guys shut up talking about the fight they're having makeup sex for or the company policy which means they shouldn't be having a relationship. They're mid-coitus, thrusting and licking and all that jazz, also discussing things, to the point I feel I have a better understanding of office politics in this world than the actual sex this scene is supposed to present.

I also didn't really believe the couple's chemistry. We're told they're in love... but Brian ran from Leland, who demands that he admit to missing him if he wants to climax. We're told Leland planned something romantic, after he's done scolding Brian about how they're meant to be together and ask-telling him they should move in together post-coitus. It feels more like the HR person asking if Brian was being sexually harassed - something discussed MID SEX SCENE, what a mood killer! - may have been onto something and this man has fallen accidentally in love with someone who saddled him with a Dom/sub relationship without asking. That clearly isn't the intent, but that's how it feels when the chemistry just isn't there and the scene is presented in such a disjointed manner.

In addition to that, at least three times, Brian slipped into pure sexism. He refers to begging like a girl, having emotions like a girl, being an office slut, etc. Not the kind of stuff I want slapped in my face when I'm trying to read erotica. Save that for a book with plot, and don't forget not to let it go unchallenged - make it a part of character growth or something instead.

My overall impression of this scene is perfectly summed up by a quote from within it: “Why in the name of sweet baby Jesus was he still talking?” Why, though? This could have been been hot erotica if it weren't so hindered by clunky worldbuilding and sexism.