You Can Talk to God Like That

Read my full review at JenniferNeyhart.com

Abby Norman is a pastor and a gifted writer and it shows. The first thing that jumped off the page as I started reading this book was Abby's pastoral tone. She is not preaching at you about lament. She is coming alongside you to encourage you as she talks about how lament can draw us in closer to God.

Abby tweeted in December of 2020 that she didn't mean to write an increasingly relevant book, but she did! The past year and a half of dealing with the pandemic and the chaotic political nonsense, along with the ongoing violence against Black people by police officers, mass shootings... there is no shortage of things to lament.

Abby is a great writer and I am sure she is a great pastor. Abby and I have been internet friends for longer than I can remember now, and I even got to meet her in person at Evolving Faith in 2018. She has been such an encouragement to me in ways big and small over the years. And I am so thankful she wrote this book! I think it could encourage a lot of people. I know it encouraged me. I ended up reading it in one sitting but I definitely want to go back through it and take my time with it.

One particularly moving part was when Abby talked about how we can hold hope for each other, and sometimes we need that because hope is too heavy for us sometimes.

My favorite part (if I have to choose just one thing) is the prayers Abby prays for her readers at the end of each chapter and at the end of the book. These prayers wash over me like the ones Sarah Bessey often prays for her readers and listeners.

What are you waiting for? Go get her book and read it! :-)

Abby Norman presents a much-needed view of lament in a Live Laugh Love world.

What happens when you can't deal with all the #Blessed privilege anymore and need some honest, raw vulnerability with God? What happens when you experience pain and see marginalization and encounter doubt? Hopefully, you know you can talk to God about it. And if you don't know about that, Abby helps you get there. Authenticity is woven throughout this book, with heartache and regret and humor and refreshing real talk about the world that doesn't shy away from confronting racism, abuse, chronic illness, and more. Abby is a faithful ally to marginalized communities, including mine (LGBTQIA+), and is a pastor with a creative mind, open hands in generosity, and a heart for empathy that isn't afraid to get messy. It's these qualities and more that make her the perfect person to write about lament without getting sappy, melodramatic, or melancholy. Instead, Abby gives a permission slip to answer “How are you” without “fine.” In fact, she points out how phrases like that hurt us and our connection with others.

You'll probably see situations you can relate to or have encountered or have wondered about. You'll exhale in relief as she says what you've hoped someone would say. It's permission to say the thing. An invitation to authenticity. A communal cry (of anger, of heartache, of grief, or frustration or longing, whatever you need, it's here). It's pastoral and real talk with a friend and a sister's hand on your shoulder.

While it's not written TO leaders, this is an especially important read for leaders. Whether you're a pastor or a parent or a manager or an older sibling or someone people turn to with their pain, you need this book. You're going to need to know these concepts and be able to share them in community.

If it's been a while since you've prayed, since you've been able to find the right words to approach God, since you've felt like talking to God at all... this is not a quick fix, not a Tips for Prayer book. This is a book that says, well, you can talk to God just like that.