Riverdale #10

Not Great. Not Terrible. Still Not Canon-Friendly.

Did they seriously name a somewhat-curvy school nurse with an hourglass-like figure Ms. Shapely? Alright, then. That certainly is a choice that was made.

I feel like a broken record every time I read one of these, but there is literally no way this takes place between episodes of the television show. In this case, they're putting on a play completely unrelated to the musicals actually done on the show AND some of the main characters (including Jughead) and a ton of background characters have contracted mononucleosis. So, no. No, they're not going right back to school as usual - especially since they're all quarantined with contagious illness. This definitely doesn't fit between episodes. It will forever be a pet peeve of mine that they didn't just go with the alternate universe angle.

That said, however, it's not terrible. Not great, either - Kevin feels like a stereotype and there's no way high schoolers are kissing over and over as part of a play - but not terrible.

Cheryl is a bit of a supervillain diva, which makes me happy because I hate how the show tried to turn her into some kind of sympathetic model of girl power when she's actually a selfish, horrible person. Seeing her actually be what she was from the start again is refreshing. Betty is a bit of a know-it-all white knight, which is also more classic Betty and a bit refreshing. Jug is very Season One classic Jughead, which doesn't fit the implied timing of some of these issues, but I miss him so I'll forgive that. And the overall flow of everything felt very true to overdramatic Riverdale form, so despite getting old fast I can't consider it a fault.??

But there are plenty of issues with this, and they're all quite glaring.??Jug willingly being in a play where he has to kiss Cheryl seems about as likely as Jug willingly going vegan. The “accidental kiss” plot is ridiculous, as well. The people who get mixed up are all quite different from each other in ways nobody could mistake no matter how inebriated, distracted, or caught in a dark room. Voices (from the show), appearances, body types, etc. just vary too much for me to believe it. And the actual solution to the mystery feels more suited for Scooby Doo or a sitcom than Riverdale, but I'm not at all surprised about that.

Overall, I'm torn. I enjoyed this plot from a detached standpoint. It's interesting and amusing, and with unfamiliar characters I'd latch on and just enjoy the ride. With the familiar characters and the book claiming to take place between episodes of the televised version of Riverdale, however, it all kind of crumbles to pieces and feels ridiculous and out of place.

Four stars as a standalone. Two as a Riverdale thing. I guess I'll just even it out and give three stars.