It's Not Okay

I read this after listening to reality steve's podcast interview of Kelly Travis (one of Andi's close friends). Shoutout to reality Steve and his podcast. Hardcore recommend.

This book was...good, at times. I like Andi, I like who she is and although there we don't seem to have much in common besides sassy/assertive personalities and law school I didn't find this book annoying.

The only thing is it read as part memoir part actual novel. It would've been better for her to pick a lane. I'll probably read her new book though not gonna lie. She made me care about her and I appreciated that she included the inspiration for the book in this: a realistic self help post breakup novel.

I would give this no stars if I could. I thought this was going to be a delightful dirty pleasure read (HUGE Bachelor fan, and references to this book were cropping up left and right on the show, so I felt like I had to read it to be in the loop.....CLEVER MARKETING ABC), but it is just straight trashy. Before reading this book, Andi was one of my favorite Bachelorettes. Now, I realize she's not a really great person (or writer for that matter), at all. While some of the insights into how the show works were interesting, the rest was essentially unreadable. So, yeah. Not proud I read this. But it happened, and will likely be the last time I pick up any book written by a reality TV contestant.

I wanted to read this book because watching the Bachelor(ette) shows is one of my guilty pleasures, regardless of the grief the men in my house give me. :) The book is well written and she did a good job explaining the relationship she found herself in and how she recovered from it and moved on. It was, in fact, more of a “how to survive a big breakup and move on” than a tell-all. I'm glad that it was for her sake, and I found myself feeling like maybe people deserve their privacy and deserve to live out their relationships in private. Time will tell if I ‘tune in' for the next round of the show.

If you came for the tell-all you'll do a lot of skimming, like I did.

I was consistently disgusted with Andi Dorfman for the first half, but then the tone changed slightly and by the end it had actually seemed like she'd grown as a person. At least a little bit. She's either more clever than I thought and managed to do this on purpose or she has a great editor who whipped this shitshow into some slight semblance of redemption.

Dorfman still comes across like a spoiled, sheltered, mean-girl no matter what though. There are so many unnecessary catty explanations for her behavior. I'm not convinced she drank and mentioned alcohol as much as she did because she was going through a breakup. You can be a functioning alcoholic and mostly drink wine.

“Atny” she abbreviated to complete my nametag.
Though she'd abbreviated my profession incorrectly, I decided to let it slide, since I was, after all, there to make a good impression.

I informed the group that we would all be taking a lie detector test! Yay! The horror on their faces made the feminist inside me squeal with excitement.

I couldn't risk impulsively using him for sex, since clearly my urge had not yet been satisfied, and though the feminist in me kind of wanted to “hit it and quit it,” I wasn't ballsy or bitchy enough to do it.

Or when your friend has a baby exactly eight months after her wedding and everyone plays along with the whole it's-a-honeymoon-baby bullshit.

Good Lord, what if I have to go number two?

The fireplace catches my eye... I'll burn it all!... First up, the striped pima cotton t-shirt... I see the tag still on it.

I grasp the sides of the waistband and go for the power tug. That's when I hear the dreaded sound of a rip... That seam is not stretched, it's split. I quickly roll the leggings down my thighs and, in an effort to hide my mortification, hang them back up and slip them in the middle of the rest of the hanging pants, before sprinting out of the dressing room without trying on another item.

He hates red lipstick, just like every other man in this world does.

...recognizing the simple yet impactful meaning of friendships.

This book is for you if - and only if - you enjoyed Andi's season on The Bachelor and then watching her on The Bachelorette. (If you aren't a fan of her or this reality TV franchise then definitely pass on this light read.) These pages reaffirmed how much I like this authentic, intelligent and fun-loving woman!