Are You My Mother? A Comic Drama

I was a fan of Alison Bechdel's comic strip Dykes To Watch Out For back in the early 90s, but this is my first book length Bechdel. I liked it! This is at once a memoir and analysis of Bechdel's relationship with her mother from childhood to the present and a mini course on the life and psychological theories of D. W. Winnicott, who is known for his insights into children's psychological development.

Bechdel is open about her struggles with not feeling loved and valued by her mother (or, secondarily, by anyone else), depicting herself in therapy sessions, in conversations with her mom where she looks for affirmation and doesn't receive it, and in relationships with women who are ambivalent about committing to her. Her use of WInnicott's theories to analyze what might have been going on between her and her mother is a little technical and dry for someone not used to reading psychology texts, but her illustrations and the bits of information about Winnicott's life that she provides helped me through. Virginia Woolf and her novel To the Lighthouse also figure in this book. My favorite parts were when the text of the comic was about something from Winnicott or To the Lighthouse, but the illustration showed Bechdel and her mother having an interaction.

Overall, I'd recommend this if you already like Alison Bechdel or if you struggle with your relationship with your mom. Either way, it's insightful, compassionate, and the illustrations are great.