Mimi
... Ok, but why didn't your dad just teach you the damn recipe?
Anyway, this was fine. Just fine. But just fine in a more positive way than a low 3 “just fine". I thought Roy and Kotaro were cute together, I also most cried seeing them try to do a high five but Kotaro didn't have his glasses on so they missed and I loved everything about that bit. My only problem was how the dialogue flowed. something about the dialogue felt off in a way that felt like I was missing context. Like, the amount of times I've said “why bring that up out of nowhere" or “who asked" was a lot.
The way they brought up certain topics felt forced, like they were being told their next line off screen while also being told to stay on track. There was a part where Masuda came by to pick up the order list and, without being promoted, brought up Kotaro was down at the cafe, kicking off the conflict. That's just one of three parts that's stood out to me like that, but It didn't make sense for him to bring that up the way he did because it didn't feel natural to the conversation. It came off as gossip to start something for no reason and that's just how a lot of conversations went in this story. When people talked it either felt like a tonal whiplash or or “who asked" moment.
... Ok, but why didn't your dad just teach you the damn recipe?
Anyway, this was fine. Just fine. But just fine in a more positive way than a low 3 “just fine". I thought Roy and Kotaro were cute together, I also most cried seeing them try to do a high five but Kotaro didn't have his glasses on so they missed and I loved everything about that bit. My only problem was how the dialogue flowed. something about the dialogue felt off in a way that felt like I was missing context. Like, the amount of times I've said “why bring that up out of nowhere" or “who asked" was a lot.
The way they brought up certain topics felt forced, like they were being told their next line off screen while also being told to stay on track. There was a part where Masuda came by to pick up the order list and, without being promoted, brought up Kotaro was down at the cafe, kicking off the conflict. That's just one of three parts that's stood out to me like that, but It didn't make sense for him to bring that up the way he did because it didn't feel natural to the conversation. It came off as gossip to start something for no reason and that's just how a lot of conversations went in this story. When people talked it either felt like a tonal whiplash or or “who asked" moment.