Melanie
A wealth of information that sent us down plenty of rabbit holes filling in gaps of historical knowledge. Some sentences left me rereading them 4-5 times to fully understand some pieces..perhaps room for improving clarity on those, but sometimes politics is just plain confusing like that. Overall I'm extremely glad I've read this book to fix my whitewashed, oversimplified, gappy education. It was fascinating learning the origins of racist ideas and he really challenges the idea of putting people in boxes, with showing the evolution of certain characters and their ways of thinking changing, sometimes good, sometimes bad.
I got a few chuckles about it and it started some conversation with my husband. Some of it makes sense, and I get the importance of different language, although I don't think I can recommend this to a lot of clients. I liked his line of “Who you are is what you're willing to struggle for” and the idea of choosing our problems, not our goals. Some of the latter of the book didn't seem as impactful to me, and I think I got a little hung up about his loose or lack of definition of values (I see values and priorities a little different, defining ‘values' is sometimes important).
I appreciate Foer's ability to cross genres and his presentation of information. It's a lot to take in, a lot of it unpleasant (the point) and he manages to create the desire to do so. I love his posing questions and thought points, owns the ambivalence and struggle. I as vegetarian listened with my omnivorous partner and it inspired a ton of conversation between us.. In addition, I think, to convincing partner to give up meat, or at least some forms. (Other documentaries etc haven't convinced him). I only wish Foer had addressed the dairy industry as well.
I read this as a client told me they found it useful. I see a lot of overlap/different languaging with codependency but I can see it as a useful framework especially for understanding some of the roots of codependency and perhaps a bit more...‘bite-size' in a way. I'm yet unsure whether it poses the work as more simplistic or if there's something I read into that from the audiobook reader's tones and inflection. Either way, it's nice to have another language for clients who may not resonate with codependency as much. Frequently there's benefit to hearing the same thing 10 different ways when it's something we need to grasp, and validating the experience. I do think the two work well hand in hand together, as one client told me her takeaway from this book was “create distance”...it can be more complex than that. This is one I will keep referring to clients, though.
This has been on my shelf for a while, I've known I'm an HSP for at least as long. I expected to like this book, start using it as a resource for clients, and maybe get some useful personal tips as well. Instead I found myself eager to be done.
I'm almost amused how much I disliked the book considering how much I agree with things she said, but “thorough” felt like “TMI”. Books are totally open to be taken at one's own pace, but it felt almost ironic that she packed so much in as stimulation/information overload into what starts out as an introduction to a concept. And by the end, things felt almost tangential (How Hitler persuaded people? what? We should all be priests among the world? Is suggesting asking your doctor to read the book in order to help you, realistic?)
She makes a point to differentiate shyness, which she says has a negative connotation, with HSP, of which she says she tries to highlight the useful qualities. Somehow I left more confused about the differentiation than I started, and I felt the overall theme through the book actually DID create a link of HSP as a diagnosis and something that likely needs hand-holding and ‘treating' with therapy and possibly drugs.
I absolutely believe the concept of HSP is useful, however I felt there were too many things conflated here; HSP, shyness, introversion, attachment styles, codependence. The relationship coaching suggestions for relationship she offered? Useful- FOR ANY couple, not just relationships involving HSPs. I guess this can be validating for some, but I think I would prefer stopping at “yes there's often a link between HSP and attachment styles, you might want to look more into that.”
Engaging right from the start and throughout. I learned a ton, got the ride of emotions..great read. I came into this one NOT as picking up a book of a celebrity, I've honestly only seen one 10 minute Youtube of Trevor speaking seriously about racism. Definitely interested to learn more about where his story goes from where this book leaves off.
I appreciate the human approach and lots of information. I've tried more recipes online, haven't gotten too excited about the ones in the book, but the suggested meal plan seems like a cool idea. Not sure I have it in me to truly give the diet a try without my partner on board, but the information makes sense and sounds appealing.
Marshall is the Bob Ross of language. Makes it sound easy, compassion, soothing voice to listen to if you get the audiobook. NVC, while definitely not native language for me, makes sense, and I refer a lot of my clients to it. Reading the book affirms even more my appreciation. I appreciate his personal anecdotes and perspective about clinical psychology as validating to my holistic approach. The book felt relatively comprehensive, although reading it is not enough to make practicing it feel easy...and I would love to hear more about the self empathizing/being with that must be involved to look to connect with the other's pain in egregious and inflammatory interactions.
Even if you have no interest in learning about NVC, I'd recommend this audiobook if you have trouble sleeping. Let his voice tuck you in!
Weekend at Bernie's meets Crazy Rich Asians. I like the relationship with the aunties but I honestly found this painful to read at points. Why does Nathan have to be SO idealized instead of a real, complex character? Why do we have to be reminded of her pubescent heart flutter at every mention of him, even when serious ** is happening? It's a fantastical story but the overblown storytelling (or reading/audiobook?) made me think of a fourth grader over exaggerating when they're telling a joke you've only heard a hundred times but they think is novel.
