You Disappear

There's something about text translated from Scandinavian languages that is very distinct. It's curt, the dialogue between characters is very pointed and sometimes stilted. I know almost nothing about Scandinavian languages but I imagine it must just be how they are, that anything translated into English would sound curt to native English speakers. I like it though, it's a style I tend to like in certain books and it's interesting to be able to recognize a book as a translation.

So about this book.
I liked it. Near the end I was doing that thing where you read a book as often and fast as possible because you know you're near the end and there's another book waiting for you that you're really excited about, but that doesn't mean you don't enjoy the book you're currently trying to finish as fast as you can.
I had a lot of sympathy for the main character. I saw a few reviewers who didn't like her because she seemed selfish or uncaring, but I disagree. She made a lot of decisions that I maybe wouldn't have made, and a few I probably would have made but felt bad about them later...but she's in a uniquely distressing situation. It's hard enough to care for a partner with a debilitating injury, even harder when that injury causes marked personality changes and the inability for the person to feel empathy or be able to thank you for what you're doing - and especially harder when you weren't even sure you wanted to stay with this person before the injury! I can't imagine it. Everything that Mia did, even if selfish, seemed legit to me. Again, not legit in that I could condone her choices, but given her circumstances, it makes sense to be frustrated and lash out and seek comfort wherever you can get it.
I liked all the interludes of neuro-philosophy, I thought that stuff was all really interesting. Where does your personality live? What is “you”? If you can claim that brain damage made you do something that you wouldn't normally have done, can we claim that none of us are at fault for anything we do? If you are a jerk, it's because your brain is just wired that way. I don't agree with that necessarily, but it's interesting to think about.

There were a few too many parts in the book where they talked about “men being men”...i.e. men will always cheat, they're “hot-blooded”, they care less about your feelings than women do, etc. Even the idea that Bernard is somehow "less of a man" because his brain damage caused him to give up his cheating ways and become monogamous and care deeply about the people around him. Fuck you, Frederik, if a "real man" is going to cheat on me and disregard my feelings, I would 100% prefer a "fake man". The idea that a man can only be an attentive and loyal partner if he's brain damaged is messed up. Jungersen is a man and this book is written from a woman's point of view, so I'm not sure if that's what Jungersen thinks women think about men, or if that's what he actually thinks about his own gender, but either way, I am unimpressed.