The Way I Used to Be

Why do I feel like, sometimes, I have no one in the entire world who knows me in even the slightest, most insignificant way?

this book was beautiful. it hurt at times and I cried a little bit. it was in no way easy to read. at times I wanted to just stop reading. it wasn't enjoyable at all, but it was a necessary read.

I read this based on a teen therapy client's request. They strongly identify with Eden, the protagonist, unfortunately due to similar experiences, and of course I'm grateful they found something that resonates with their experience! This is a totally serviceable book for any teen book collection, and Smith deals with the aftermath of rape (not a spoiler; that's page 1) generally sensitively. I did have some fairly significant quibbles. First, Smith wrote all the characters as racially ambiguous, and I suppose I see the intention (while noting what certain roads are paved with), and shout out to someone who wrote a great article for their high school news site about why racially ambiguous characters aren't actually helpful: https://conantcrier.com/voices/opinions/young-adult-literature-needs-more-representation/. My other quibbles are that some of the supportive characters are pretty one-dimensional, and I really think the 3rd quarter of the book documenting Eden's struggles with self-neglect could have been shortened while still getting the same point across. To end on a positive, though, since I am glad this is out there for teens, Smith resists the urge to tie things up too prettily with a bow at the end, which certainly rings true to life.