The New Me

This is like if you recorded yourself going through a mental health crisis (where your thoughts turn into conspiracies and everything is evil and disgusting and you're convinced you'll never be happy again) and you watch it back once you've been medicated or taken a long nap. You notice valid points in arguments and evils you've conjured up, but you've also come back to earth by now and realized you sound a bit crazy and don't have control over any of these things and maybe even blew everything out of proportion.

At times, I found Millie extremely unlikeable and whiny because of this. Her predicament is a somewhat lucky one. I mean, she had a temp job that she might've been able to keep had she shredded a small stack of papers. But I also realized that I've had her same anger and jealousy so I can't hate her too much. Her job was unfulfilling and she was obviously depressed. Having your parents to fall back on you can't erase that, thought it was an unrealistic aspect of her career. You get to keep your apartment for weeks with no job, great! Her friend pointed this out, which was cool. But her friend was just as awful and bitter so I hated her as well.

Ultimately what I took from this is that it never really gets better. You just find a job that you can survive on and keep it. The young people who come after you will always think less of your position and personality and are convinced they can do better. They cannot. It's a bit bleak. But it's something you can resonate with or see yourself in. I had a hard time getting into moments where Millie gets to thinking about life on an almost philosophical level (just quick thoughts, nothing too serious. this is not a book about philosophy). Just moments where her struggles make her think about free will, what it means to be an individual, etc. Just felt a bit cheesy? Millie is obviously struggling but like, let's go on LinkedIn or Indeed girl! It felt like a cop out to blame the universe or a lack of free will.

I'll always make this disclaimer for books where I hated everyone: maybe that's the point. If the author was going for unlikeable characters who have no joy and the tension/conflict is mostly in their head, then they did an excellent job! If nothing else, these are characters who are awful or mean to each other (and themselves). They're complex and angry, which people don't write all the time. But it still wasn't my favorite and I found myself skimming entire paragraphs at a time (and still being able to keep up with the plot somehow). It is a quick read so it wasn't too much of a loss of time. This is definitely not for everyone.