Seven Blades in Black

sigh.

okay.

so i actually really liked this book in the beginning. the story is started and framed in a way i've recently loved in another book (Empire of the Vampire) where the main character is imprisoned and made to tell their life story. sal had a cool character design and a badass name and always seemed to come out on top not in the way that she was massively overpowered but more in the way of “this mf just won't die” which is always a fun main character archetype in my opinion. i thought i'd be obsessed with this book and that i'd devour the sequels. 

i did not.

first let me list what i liked about this book:

• the world and atmosphere were awesome. a mix between fantasy, sci-fi, and western but it somehow WORKED. the conflict between the imperium and the revolution wasn't seen as black and white but rather in shades of grey (more on the scale of everyone is bad rather than everyone is both bad and good, but i still appreciated the message) the whole “magic vs machinery” idea this book had going was also cool, kinda giving me steampunk vibes.
  • i appreciate how that comes through even on a smaller scale: i.e even the “villain” characters being dynamic and complex, so we feel sympathy for them and understand why they're doing what they're doing.
    • tretta willing to do whatever it takes to find out what happened to cavric, the mages that were a part of the crown conspiracy not just wanting to overthrow the imperium because the heir was a nul, but specifically because they knew he wouldn't understand the Bargain and the sacrifices mages have to make to get their power, etc etc
• some quotes that i really enjoyed, spoilered just in case:
  •   “What am I doing wrong that you'd choose this over me?”
  • ‘When you see the aftermath of a battle, you want to imagine something dramatic. You want to see corpses strewn about, tossed from where the massive explosions ripped apart the land. You want to see the lone carcass on the hill, his cold hands still wrapped around the banner he died trying to plant in the soil. You want to see some kind of meaning to it. But you only ever get that in opera.'
  • ‘Hell of a thing, I guessed, to see something like this, to look at what you've been fighting for, what you've been killing for, without the glorious operas and the marching songs and the tapestries. Hell of a thing to look at it and just see the blood and the bodies.'
  • ‘I had no regrets. Kresh had to die for a lot of reasons. And it wasn't that I felt hollow, either—anyone who tells you that revenge is empty is someone who doesn't try hard enough at it.'
  • ‘It was like he wasn't even dead. Or not dead enough. I wondered if he ever would be. If any of them would be.'
  • ‘“And realistic to you is... a house?” “A nice house.” “You could have more.” “You didn't ask what I could have. You asked what I wanted.” “I did.” He laid his hand on top of mine. It felt warm. “And you want me?” “I want everything.” I looked long to the sky overhead. The sun began to set. The clouds became orange with its dying light. “And you.”'

the worst fight she had ever had.