Powerless

okay.

this book is VERY YA. and i like reading YA books but the maturity levels that these characters have are just not working for me, and i'm only 23 years old. as always your mileage may vary but it wasn't working for me. if the best retort you can have against someone being a classist bigot to you is to say “well did growing up in the palace teach you how to be such a bitch” we are just not on the same wavelength i'm afraid.

the magic in this book was cool, but i'm somewhat picky about magic systems and this one was just a little too loose for me. it felt like different types of magic were popping up on every other page and they didn't feel planned, it felt like the abilities were just conveniently thrown in for whatever scene she was writing. especially since each ability had a name as a way to classify people – brawnies, blinks, veils, so on and so forth, but there are so many abilities mentioned just in the first 30% of the book that naming them individually seems a little silly. there's so many abilities that all the contestants for the trials – 10, leaving out paedyn – all have separate unique abilities. not a single one has crossover.

my main problem was kai and, to a lesser extent, kai and paedyn's relationship. let's just start with this: this is not enemies to lovers even though it absolutely SHOULD BE. as far as paedyn knows, kai's job (not his whole job but a big part of it) is to HUNT and KILL Ordinaries LIKE HERSELF. he's KNOWN to do this by pretty much everyone. whether he actually does it or not doesn't matter because, for all she knows, he does this regularly and without remorse. and yet from the moment they start spending extended time around each other it's all flirty banter and touching. she acknowledges what he is and what he does and it doesn't stop her from wanting him and she has no second-guessing or regrets about it.

i especially don't like how he acts towards her. pet names in general are a hit or miss for me and with kai they're definitely a miss. i can't really explain why, he just doesn't pull it off. besides that he's too arrogant for me to find him attractive and consent doesn't seem to matter unless it's convenient for him. he doesn't do anything as awful as assault her (to my knowledge) but he's just constantly crossing little boundaries and i really just can't stand it. the most egregious bit of this (and what made me dnf) was when the palace was being attacked and he was trying to get paedyn to leave. she refused because she wanted to stay and help but he said, and I'm quoting, “Then don't think I won't throw you over my damn shoulder and carry you out of here myself. Is that what you want?” obviously him threatening to take away her agency is SO sexy and it's even SEXIER when he actually does it and grabs her against her will and carries her even as she literally fights him off and tells him to let her go, which he ignores. so yeah. i do not like kai.

there was no point in going on with the book because obviously they're going to end up together regardless, which is even more annoying because this is the first time I've seen a love triangle set where i was actually rooting for the OTHER GUY to win. and it's obvious this book was going to pull another timeless iteration of “oh no don't go with the mature, well-adjusted guy who respects your boundaries and treats you well. you have to choose the hot bad boy who doesn't respect your boundaries or consent and is emotionally constipated and distant!!” and i just. cannot.