Empire of the Vampire

It took me one whole week to read 20% of this and I can't go on. This book is similar to [b:The Name of the Wind 186074 The Name of the Wind (The Kingkiller Chronicle, #1) Patrick Rothfuss https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1270352123l/186074.SX50.jpg 2502879]. Now many a Rothfuss fanboy will scream at my face about how KKC is liekm the best series EVER and it's absolute genius. No, it isn't. Nor is this one so. You know the feeling when you are like... 14 and everything is dramatic? You are so deep and every annoying piece of comical melodrama is the best thing ever? This is it. Except... it isn't? Because it has a lot of adult content. Which is fine, I am an adult, but because I am, the attempted gravitas is just pathetic to me, but also the content makes it not really suitable for actual kids. It's also very verbose. People of a certain country or region or whatever are obviously the world's version of black people. Yet we have to read repetitive descriptions of them being black and having dreadlocks. Pro tip, after making it obvious they are the black people, just mentioning they are from that place is pretty much enough, you don't have to also say they have dark skin every time. I also can remember a character having feckles. You don't have to tell me every scene. She is freckled, yes. It just never seems to get anywhere. We are going with the story and it's still setting things up without making any progress. I like me some vampires. That's not the issue. But this is such a stiff book. No flow, no playfulness, not wit. Just overwritten angst. It takes itself so seriously, meanwhile the story itself is really not clever or anything. I found some unintentional comedy in it, except I was also really dang bored. It has illustrations, though. They are pretty nice, I have to give that to them. A bit samey, Instagram, webcomic style, but with impressive detail.