Demon Card Enforcer

John Stovall’s *Demon Card Enforcer* is an ambitious dive into a deckbuilding LitRPG set against the backdrop of an alternate Earth—a premise that immediately grabbed my attention as a longtime fan of strategic card games like Magic: The Gathering. The novel promises an intriguing blend of game mechanics and narrative, but despite the captivating concept, its execution leaves much to be desired.

A Promising Premise Undermined by Execution

At its core, *Demon Card Enforcer* offers a unique twist: merging the mechanics of deckbuilding with the stakes of a mobster narrative. This concept, on paper, has the potential to reinvent aspects of the LitRPG genre, inviting readers to experience the thrill of a high-stakes game within a gritty alternate reality. Unfortunately, while the idea shines, the way it unfolds on the page is marred by structural and stylistic issues.

Story Structure and Pacing: A Jarring Narrative Rhythm

The book’s narrative is divided between bursts of action and prolonged stretches of exposition. Early on, the novel hooks you with a series of dramatic twists and high-octane sequences that promise a dynamic story. Yet, these exciting moments are quickly undercut by lengthy dialogues where characters end up “vomiting” exposition at each other. These exchanges aren’t subtle—they involve the characters recounting obvious details that anyone living in this world would already know, much like a conversation between two people about how to fire a rifle when they should intuitively know the basics.

This over-reliance on clunky, heavy-handed exposition not only interrupts the flow but also makes the narrative feel disjointed. Instead of naturally integrating background information into the storyline, the author often resorts to repetitive dialogue that spells out elements which, frankly, are self-evident. This approach dilutes the impact of the more dynamic scenes and creates an uneven reading experience.

One-Dimensional Characters and Missed Opportunities

Another critical flaw in the novel is its character development—or rather, the lack thereof. The main character, who should ideally carry the weight of the story, is presented in a decidedly one-dimensional manner. Unlike more compelling protagonists (think John Wick, who, despite his minimalistic dialogue, is quickly defined by a brief, evocative montage), this protagonist’s motivations and internal conflicts are shrouded in mystery for far too long. This deliberate withholding not only leaves the character feeling flat but also alienates the reader, who is left wondering about the rationale behind his questionable decisions.

The supporting cast fares no better. The secondary characters come off as clichés, lacking the depth needed to create genuine emotional connections. Their dialogue, already burdened by unnecessary exposition, further reinforces their stereotypical roles, making it hard for any of them to resonate. When every conversation is an opportunity to spoon-feed the reader information, the narrative loses its subtlety and fails to engage on an emotional level.

Writing Style: Exposition Overload and Predictable Twists

Perhaps the most glaring issue in *Demon Card Enforcer* is its writing style. Stovall’s prose is frequently weak, burdened by excessive exposition that feels more like a lecture than an integral part of the story. In one instance, the author employs an in-world device—a character briefly flipping on a radio—to deliver background information. This moment stood out as a creative alternative to the otherwise clumsy dialogue-driven exposition, and it’s a shame that such techniques aren’t used more often.

Instead, most of the narrative is laden with forced dialogue where characters relay information that should be common knowledge in their world. This not only interrupts the natural flow of the story but also pulls the reader out of the immersive experience. One particularly frustrating moment comes with the reveal of the antagonist’s identity. It’s so overt that by the time the author finally reveals to the reader who the “bad guy” is, it feels like the reader has already known for the last 30 chapters—a twist that comes off as entirely predictable rather than a cleverly crafted mystery.

World-Building: An Underdeveloped Alternate Earth

Despite its potential, the world-building in *Demon Card Enforcer* remains underdeveloped. The alternate Earth concept, enriched with game mechanics, offers an exciting canvas, but the heavy-handed exposition overshadows the setting. While the chapter headings that list the “game rules” are a creative touch and one of the book’s few bright spots, they aren’t enough to elevate the overall narrative.

The description of the world is serviceable, yet it never fully immerses the reader. The excessive dialogue and repetitive background details slow the pacing and prevent a seamless integration of the setting into the narrative. Instead of inviting readers to explore a vividly realized alternate Earth, the book feels like it’s stuck on a single, overexposed snapshot.

Themes and Motifs: Familiar Tropes Without Depth

At its heart, *Demon Card Enforcer* attempts to explore themes common to mob narratives and redemption arcs. However, these themes are treated in a manner that feels both unoriginal and uninspired. The narrative leans too heavily on familiar tropes without adding any fresh perspective. The overused “who’s the bad guy” plot is a prime example—it’s so heavily telegraphed that any suspense is quickly dispelled, leaving the reader with little more than a predictable outcome.

The lack of subtlety in conveying these themes diminishes their impact. Instead of gradually building tension or inviting reflection on the blurred lines between right and wrong, the book opts for a direct, and often clumsy, presentation that leaves little room for nuance or engagement.

Audiobook Narration: Talented Voices, Unsalvageable Material

For those who prefer audiobooks, *Demon Card Enforcer* is brought to life by a trio of narrators—Justin Thomas James, Jeff Hays, and Tiana Camacho. Each does their best to inject life into the text, yet even their performances can’t fully overcome the underlying issues with the material. Their attempts at differentiating characters and adding depth are continually hampered by the same uneven pacing and overwhelming exposition that affect the written narrative. In the end, the audiobook experience mirrors the reading experience: a struggle to stay engaged in a narrative burdened by its own flaws.

Final Thoughts and Recommendations

In my quest for a fresh take on LitRPG and progression fantasy, I approached *Demon Card Enforcer* with high hopes. The innovative premise of integrating deckbuilding elements into a gritty alternate Earth narrative was enough to pique my interest. However, as the story progressed, it became increasingly clear that the execution was marred by an overabundance of clunky dialogue, one-dimensional characters, and a writing style that leaned too heavily on obvious exposition.

For those who value subtlety and well-developed character arcs, this book might prove disappointing. The protagonist’s mysterious nature and the supporting cast’s clichéd roles make it hard to form an emotional connection, while the predictable plot twists—especially the overly obvious reveal of the antagonist—only add to the sense of missed potential.

That said, if you’re curious about a self-published experiment that marries gaming mechanics with a mob narrative, *Demon Card Enforcer* might still hold some appeal. Its ambition is evident, even if the final product doesn’t quite live up to its promise. However, for readers accustomed to more refined narratives—be it in LitRPG or progression fantasy—I’d recommend looking elsewhere for a more engaging and thoughtfully executed experience.

In summary, *Demon Card Enforcer* serves as a cautionary tale of how a compelling concept can be undermined by poor execution. While the idea of deckbuilding in a narrative context is innovative and the alternate Earth setting intriguing, the novel ultimately stumbles under the weight of its own exposition and predictable storytelling. For now, I find myself unable to wholeheartedly recommend this title, particularly to readers seeking depth, subtlety, and a more polished narrative style.

It's a really interesting world, but the characters themselves are the weakpoint imo.   The main character feels like the author is trying too hard to make them a BA but they end up, at least to mo, as more of an a-hole.    I picked up cheaply on audibles sale and will probably continue to the next book since I think both cost me $6 total.