Darling

I managed to get to 18% before deciding to dnf and I was so bored throughout it all. From the apparent perfection of Cherry/Cerise and although her hometown views her as a bad girl for various reasons – she ran off with a man, left him, had a baby with another man, made sure her kids were fed and dressed (but that was with a job that left them clutching their pearls) but she's still seen as the ‘darling' of the town. Two men want to be with her, or maybe only one really did, but I saw absolutely no chemistry with Cerise (in fact it felt like she had no chemistry with anyone, including her kids) with either of them. The whole spiel of all the townspeople disliking her because of her choices but then also constantly showing up to help her annoyed me so much. Either have them dislike her outright or have them help her out.

The language trying to be flowery but it just fell flat for me and somehow added to trying to make Cerise out to be an amazing mom because she's great with the kids even when they're ‘difficult'. It's just all of that just tried to make Cerise a strong character and I didn't feel it at all.

So the older kid, Jonah, is disabled. It's said he has a genetic disorder and although it's not mentioned anywhere, he's autistic and largely non-verbal too. The author said in the acknowledgements that she wrote Jonah based on/for her disabled kid – and then she names his diagnoses – so we basically know what Jonah's diagnoses are. I don't know when the book is set because the year is never mentioned. Phones, their cords and cradles are mentioned but seeing as the book is set in a small town it makes sense for them to still have corded phones – let's say still into the 2000's. Jonah wears headphones, but they're actually not a new thing (dating back somewhere to the 1800s, surprisingly). All of that is to say – the r-slur is used a few times in the book – when is this book set? Their usage of it felt so casual). Either way, I don't like the slur – whenever the book is set.

I didn't like how Cerise spoke about Jonah. Specifically there was this line where he wakes up and his eyes are like dulled by the reality of life. And then it says he's ‘only fully himself when asleep' which annoyed me a lot because he stims a lot. So what? He's not himself when he stims? Stimming even helps the person feel more like themself. I stim (ADHD, not autistic) and stimming is something I like to do – it calms me down, it shows when I'm happy etc. Stimming isn't only for happy or angry. sometimes we just like to make noise for fun! Also it felt like he was only there to prop Cerise up, to show how good of a mom she was because she's taking care of him.