Breaking Dawn
2008 • 756 pages

Ratings799

Average rating3

15

My 2nd time through I think I really truly appreciated the amazing campy glory of this book and no longer endorse the vitriol I felt for it in 2009, although I will leave the original 1-star review below for posterity. (I have upgraded it to 2 stars. Let's not get carried away.)

http://www.frowl.org/worstbestsellers/episode-82-breaking-dawn/

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I think my review of this can best be summarized by the series of text messages I sent to a friend while I was reading it. They really capture the depth of my emotions as I was entranced in this literary work.

1. CALL ME AS SOON AS YR CLASS IS OVER, YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE HOW RIDICULOUS THIS BOOK IS!!! :O

2. THIS BOOK IS SO BAD IT MAKES MY SOUL HURT THE WAY YOUR RECTUM WOULD IF EDWARD CULLEN ANALLY RAPED YOU :( * (This joke may seem in poor taste, and in fact IS in poor taste, but it does have its roots in a series of other inside jokes. If that helps. Don't judge me, I didn't write Breaking Dawn.)

3. ALSO NOW THERE IS A CHARACTER NAMED RENATA, I'M CHANGING MY NAME TO DISASSOCIATE MYSELF :(

4. Done with this garbage/Twilight is the new Secret/And both should be burned. (* The Secret is a self-help book that we're obsessed with making fun of. Also, I don't really advocate book burning. Not even for this book. I guess.)

January 1, 2009