American Baby

As a Jewish Baby Boomer with friends who were adopted, this book made a big impression on me. I knew the basics of how adoptions worked in the 1950s-60s but hadn't really stopped to think how cruel the process was to both birth parents and their children. The fact that the children were frequently placed in foster care limbo for months while a “perfect match” was sought for their personalities and intelligence is just horrifying to me considering what we know now about attachment, and the damage that can be caused when that process is disrupted. And the shame and grief that the birth mothers had to bear, while being told to “forget about” children they carried for nine months, is inconceivable in today's world where single parenthood is no longer a stigma.

Glaser does a good job balancing the portrayal of Margaret and the son she was forced to relinquish, with the larger picture of how the adoption process evolved over time and the unethical, immoral practices that were carried out, frequently in the name of “science.” I wish she had delved a little deeper into the macro issues; while Margaret and David's stories were poignant, there was nothing unique about them. Also this book might speak less to readers who are not white and Jewish like me; Glaser admits that there is a very different history of adoption in the black community that she is not capable of telling.

I had a childhood friend who was adopted, with a biological younger sister who was frequently referred to as the parents' “real” daughter. My friend never discussed how much that must have hurt her, but years later after both parents had died, she found her biological parents through genetic testing. Now in her late 50s, she has half siblings, nieces and nephews who have enriched her life. If her adoption had been open, how would her life had been different? Glaser's book shines a spotlight on Margaret, David, my friend, and thousands of other individuals whose pain was minimized unjustly. American Baby rightfully speaks for them by acknowledging a shameful part of American history.