Shy Swag

( warning I am mean and vile :D )

I thought about not writing a review for this but I feel compelled to warn those who think this will just be a cute quick read. First, I slugged through this. It was boring, uninteresting, had no charm or mystique about it. Also the sex scenes were bland and added NOTHING to the story, maybe if the sex scenes were written better I could have ignored how egregious this book is.

Too many Harry Potter references. Like shut the fuck up lol.

The quick added little “omg women moment! women taking back their power!” feels cheap. There is nothing else in the book that supports the few pages that try to strike at a feminist notion. Its insulting honestly.

Also white people alert! I was put off immediately by the Penhallow family. Rich europeans who came to America, stole land, built a town using a woman's body, and live as legacy holders who don't even live in the town they built. The whiteness is staggering and uncomfortable. With the authors stab at feminism I expected nothing less. Any message this book tries to send about anything meaningful is so clumsily that its degrading. I'm not saying a book has to make some statement either, but this one was teetering around race and sexism in a way I suspected was meant to be cheeky and light hearted.

Next is the dialogue. HOLY SHIT. Most annoying people ever. Only characters worth not hating are the cat and aunt. Everyone else has the most insufferable dialogue and internal monologue. Would you like to read an example???

“Pushing herself off of him, Vivienne rose to her feet and began brushing the leaves and various debris from her skirt.

Her polka dot skirt.

Her whole dress was polka dot, he saw now, little orange ones on a black background.

Had he always found polka dots so instantly, intensely erotic?

Wasn't really a thing he'd considered before, and it was possible he'd hit his head somewhere in his fall, but there was nothing for it now. Polka dots had replaced black lace and red satin in any sexual fantasy he might have had for the rest of his life.”

Apologies for the formatting but is that not the most ridiculous, least funny, annoying thing you've ever read? The entire thing is written this way.

Speaking of the way it's written, the plot, the romance, the characters, it's all so boring. So many things can be removed and it would not affect anything. The characters do not develop or change, they stay the same as the were at 19 years old even though they are now 30. Perhaps these boring empty slates of words should be together.

They never talk about why the summer they shared in college ended. Us, the audience, understands both sides of the story but it was the only conversation I was looking forward to in the entire book and it did not happen. Essentially, Rhys (terrible name btw, choosing to hate it because I am a hater), the male lead, is from a prestigious line of witches, his father decides to arrange a marriage for him.

Rhys, tells Vivi about this. True he does not soften the blow, but Vivi storms off before he can explain any of it. He has never met this other woman, he had no plans of his own to get married, he is being forced into a situation that he did not intend to be in. Why did he never explain this to Vivi? And why did Vivi not have more questions herself if she was so madly in love and heartbroken by him?

Not to mention, the degree to which they hold flames for each other is ridiculous. Years, years, years have passed, they did not have an epic summer romance. The book describes a typical summer fling, not a relationship worth spending your late teens to early thirties still so deeply hurt about.

Then of course there is the magic aspect which is perhaps the most appealing part of the book. The magic is dull, not explained, not honed, and flip flops between its own rules. Not even the autumn atmosphere could have saved this for me.

I love this series! Its so fun to read, even if some of the turns (literally) are expected, and in some cases (superman) a little goofy it doesn't matter because like I said its just so much fun.

I think the art style matches perfectly with the story, I love the changes between a character when they are acting human vs when they are showing off some fangs. The coloring is amazing as well. A very fluid, casual style that has a lot of grace. Also bonus! Everyone is hot!

The writing is fairly solid. I mentioned superman, how can he be turned into a vampire? But also Wonder Woman. My running theory is to think of the vampire teeth as magic weapons but I still feel based on her track record it doesn't quite work. Dick is also a wonderful villain, he's not granted the role often and being an evil vampire gives him a bit of an excuse. While its a silly lil comic the heart pulls are good too, Jason and Ollie are stand outs.

I think if you do any of the following; enjoy watching jersey shore and hate it at the same time, listen to your friends twitter beef for fun, consider Charlies Angels more than you should, can hate on at least one NBA time with ease, or enjoy funky lemonade flavors at restaurants, then you'll like DC vs Vampires :p

Boring and dull, I was bitter and annoyed the entire time I read.

I liked the idea of watching the girl fall to the cult through her boyfriend's view. The rape scene was, in my eyes, entirely unnecessary. Phoebe was already too deep in the cult for her to come back to reality so easily, it's framed that her sexual assault is what drives the nail in the coffin sealing her fate in the cult

She was already in the cult at that point, she would have just continued to be sucked in further. I find it frustrating that that scene is framed in such a manner.

if you become vegan because of this book I actually think you should be hosed down

“But I grew up not knowing the difference between a bearable life and an unbearable life, and by the time I discovered there was such a thing, it was too late.”

I know lots of girls like these girls. I know women like these women. The ones who call me at any point of the 24 hours of the day asking if we can go out to eat, they are starving. Some who mention diets and trends in a nonchalant way, but who I can tell still care. Who chide another womans choices, joking and not joking.

And, like the women in this book, you gravitate towards the ones that understand your gears. Perhaps some of them don't like the way you work or the things you do but they get it. You both obsess over the same thing, you grew up in the same place and both got out, or maybe you both stayed. Maybe you have the same taste in shoes, eat the same take out. There is something you cling to that they know how to hold with you.

Anyway about the writing. Its lovely. Usually if there is a character who has sections that drag on me it changes the way I view the entire book, leaves me sour. While I disliked Miho, I think this is just because my own way of viewing trauma and art clashes with her characters personal opinions. I found What drove me wild about her was the way she said victim, how Kyuri is so silly to her sometimes, the way she says “Kyuri thinks she is a victim and it holds her back” that's not exactly what she says but I returned the book already.

Miho's sections were best when talking about her friend Ruby. Her paintings of Ruby are also interesting to me. On one hand, I understand this elaborate shrine of grief dedicate to her friend. On the other hand Miho is blinded by her world of art. She was so irritating to me because I know so many like her, and want to shake her by her shoulders. But she is well written despite my dislike for her.

There is a line where Kyuri is talking about how absurd it is for Miho to try to talk to people on the train, and be hurt when they are rude and suspicious in return. I found myself agreeing with Kyuri. I feel inclined to mention it just because how much this appalled me, Miho really just pushes all my buttons :p

I feel like I'm rambling but these are just my book thoughts as usual :p

I actually really loved the prose and the way this was written. It's wonderful writing. But every person in this book is utterly insufferable. I enjoyed very few pages of the book overall because of this and struggled to put together any well meaning thoughts about the experience.

Because like I said the writing itself is wonderful, the structure of the sentences, the choice of words, the little patterns that come out of the writing.

But the stroy and people in this story I couldn't stand.

Two stars because I liked Dima and Anna.

I read this book yesterday and am quite conflicted about it. On one hand it is very well put together. The photos, the cover, the paper, even the size of the books fits together so well.

I really enjoyed flipping through this book and reading. While there were some great photos, and a few good poems, I couldn't help but feel like this was just not enough?

She is definitely a good writer. There is potential here, and sometimes there is a line or a stanza that made me go “Yes!!! That's it's!!” so it was continually disappointing to have a few high points followed by boring, dull, choppy writing.

If it wasn't for the photos and layout of the book this would have been a terrible experience to read. I didn't know that she was an influencer of any kind so I went in blind, I think that was for the better. It made some of the photos feel less Instagram esque because that wasn't my expectation of her.

I really hope that whatever she comes out with next is better. Because it can be better.

I loved this book like nothing else. I carried it with my everywhere for weeks after finishing it, I even wrote notes in the book (a sin by my standards) but I did it because I loved this work so much. I read it at work, I read it before sleeping and I read it over and over.

As always Leonard Cohen has a type of poetic music that is in all of his words. Not a word seems out of place or wasted. Each page flows into the next with such ease. Shout out to that 1990 Christian Slater film for introducing me to Cohen when I was 14.

I finished reading this today and have mixed feelings about it.

I like;
-The emails and the format of it all
-The cover art
-When Zoey asks Agnes to do something it is the best. Starting off with something easy like the red dress, the slight escalation to the underwear, and then the odd request of the salamander.
-The apple slicer, how its a symbol of how Agnes believes Zoey can/will/is taking care of her. How it ends with the apple slicer.
-The line ‘I guess that's what makes people do horrible things – they think whatever they're doing isn't nearly as bad as what somebody else will do'

Things I don't like;
-Holy fuck the apple slice talk in the start is almost unbearable. It's way too long.
-I don't give a shit about Zoey or Agnes. I have no feelings towards them at all.
-The pacing is off. They exchange for too little, even for lonely mentally ill girls I think there isn't enough words between them. It makes some of the conversation feel jarring and oddly interjected.
-I feel like the redacted and court files aspect could have gone a lot harder and drove some of the tension more.
-Speaking of, the tension is like zero lol xd
-I also don't feel like Zoey and Agnes have any sort of relationship. They are just two people who talk on the internet who happen to have their own separate burdens who happen to entangle. Perhaps that is the point, but I wanted something more substantial between them.
-There a few times where the girls will go on long tangents describing things that I think are supposed to be scary but really just drag out for far too long.
-The most interesting moment (or at least for me personally) is when Anges opens a bit about the abuse she endured as a child via the hands of her aunt, how her aunt used to make her eat eggs whole. I understand that leaving Anges past vague is in some part intentional, but I really wanted to hear more about it.
-As other reviews and comments have pointed out; is this lesbian torture porn? While the author does identify as queer, they don't identity as a woman, or a queer woman at that. Am I saying that anyone who's not a woman should be restricted to not writing lesbian or queer woman characters? No, of course not. Still, I also can't help but wonder the same. While I imagine that was never LaRocca's intention the book doesn't have enough intention or purpose for the reader to draw any conclusion, positive or negative in regards to the question of wlw torture porn. Which is a problem in itself, that I cant garner any message from the text.

Would I suggest reading this? Yes. I think this is a book you have to read yourself to determine your thoughts about it.

I got this as a birthday present when I was in 7th grade. Like any book I am obsessed with it will never leave my side. I would spend some recesses reading this, and I loved when my classmates would leaf through it and be amazed at how absurd it looked.

I have two copies now. The first one having been devoured by time. Throughout high school, when I was in a particular dark place I would just hold the book to my chest during class, re-read my favorite passages I had marked. The first copy doesn't even have a cover anymore, it's been lent out to so many of my friends.

The second copy has a hardcover and remains mostly untouched. I have it incase the first one is out of office. My point is this book is beautiful (a word which I hardly use and dislike) and it helped me out a lot.

The best thing about this book is the aesthetics. I love the cover, the paintings, I even enjoyed how the pictures were printed. There are some good lines in there as well, but the poetry itself is only ok. Maybe less so than ok.

As far as Lana Del Rey as a celebrity goes I don't like her very much. I think some of the pretentious white girl shines through in this book.

No one is gonna talk about the weird chemistry between her and her twin brother? How come he's like “my my sister sister look at you in your TUBE dress its such a TUBE” lots of tube talk. Can anyone explain that dress she wore to the dance? Like it had coat it didn't have a coat which was it? How realistic were the paper mache feet???? I hope that's how you spell that. This book was a hilarious whirlwind like how was that less than 200 hundred pages? LIKE HOW COME SHE HAD SO MUCH SEXUAL TENSION WITH HER BROTHER INSTEAD OF HER LOVE INTEREST.