Lucas

now THIS is a book

Perfect book for the summer. It was a nice break from the last book I read, which mostly concerns with people attending parties, complicated relationships, and generally things that are moving way too fast.

Sometimes I just want to spend a summer on an island, and be disenfaged for a bit you know. Lifting up rocks and picking out strand of seaweeds off the shore, with the sounds of the waves caressing the sand in gentle and steady motion.

I had no interest in reading a book about deep sea divers because what else there is to know about it other than some people dive but deep.

But by the end I was gripping my seat, holding my breath, and ranting to my SO at length about the intricacies of deep sea diving. It's just that good. Read it if you want to know what humans are capable of, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Makes me appreciate humans a little bit more. I think I became a better person by the end there.

Glad I decided to read on after a couple of chapters because I am OBSESSED with this book now. There are some books are eternally relevant, even to this age that the author himself could never imagine, i.e. brainrot content broadcasted in video to everyone with an internet access and a small rectangular piece of metal. Technology can changed but humans haven't, considering the numerous quotable passages (at the same time both comedic and tragic) that can be said even now.

The end of the world might not be due to a cataclysmic event, but due to everyone of us, due to our humanity, and our endless march towards benefit our own parochial interests at the cost of our future and the world that houses us. Maybe the world will be burned to the ground, or inundated with seawater from the million attempts to increase just a little bit more profit, just a little bit more land, just a little bit more of us and less of them, just a tiny little bit more. The death by a thousand tiny little cuts from the billions of us.

The author would probably have given a good chuckle to know that his belief is still relevant today, a fact that makes me a little disappointed because how can we not change that much despite all the technological and humanistic advances that we make. But I decide to be optimistic, for what other options can there be... at least it's not that late yet... right? Though I still feel a sense of comfort, in the same way misery loves company, that someone wrote this novel, hoping to leave a few words for posterity, and that one day someone can enjoy it immensely; the same way two siblings sat down near a bonfire, chatting away into the night and laughing about the funny and depressing shenanigans that the fucked up family is up to, but at the same time feeling comforted by the fact that we have that we were born and raised by the same people, lived and breathed with the same people. And within that shared context, there's something magical when both of us knew what the other feel without having to say in so many sentences. That at least someone understands us.

Surprised at there being so many queers who identify with the monsters and murderers lol

So, Miller wrote this in part because of the rampant McCarthyism at the time. I remembered looking up wikipedia article about McCarthy just to see if he ever repented or at least found guilty for his lies. Turns out, he died with his conviction, maybe because he had sunk so much of his time, effort, and honor into his words that he could not retract them without looking like a fool to everyone else. So there he went, only the slow unraveling of hysteria that points to the truth. Depressing that so many people's lives had to be ruined in the process.

I finished reading the article with unresolved anger, because I had hope that there will be justice somehow, the victims fairly compensated, the accusers be shamed and punished, y'know, like a neat bow-tied wrapped story. But I guess life is what it is and you cannot will it to be satisfying.

I looked up Salem with trials with the same hope, that somehow bad deeds will not go unpunished. But I learned that only one of the accusers repented, and the victims slowly received their compensation and overdue absolution. So maybe I should be happy that a little justice is served? But a part of me wishes for the sweet schadenfreude followed the shame and punishment to the bad guys. Then again, what can we do, but to hope that this gives us a lesson to empathize and stem our hatred, which is after all the cause to all this. Since both of the events happened a long time ago, the people affected are gone now, finally found peace in their rest. Let's just hope the world wouldn't let this happen again, a pipe dream yeah, but to dream is to fight and to fight is to make the world a little better. Isn't that worth doing

humor and heart

but also very sad and joyful. love.

I have always scared of growing old, even as an 8 yo kid. The loss of independence, physical prowess, terrifies me. I mean what are they looking forward to. But I'm glad I read this book, despite all, these people still have hopes, still have things they're looking forward to, even if it's something like seeing a cute cashier boy at Walgreen's, or going to see the beach for the first time in years. It's a choice to have hope and desires and will to live, a hard choice yes, but a choice nonetheless. Take that, entropy!

Reading this book makes me feels like a kid again, one who stays up late at night watching Animal Plant and the incredibly varied and diverse lives that are possible on this planet.

And for the adult me, it makes me realized my own subjective experience and that what life can offer is rich. To know oneself is to know the world.

Charming. In a young person kind of way.

I didn't realize how broken my attention was until it was pointed out, and I was terrified of it, because I miss the person I was before I had a supercomputer within grasp that can supercharged me with infotainment anytime I want, one that I seemingly get anxious if I didn't have it on me, a stupid phone that can act as a massive black hole of attention.

I used to post a lot of short thoughts on Facebook, sometimes funny observations, sometimes insights into how things work or the people I met. They're not particularly Nobel-worthy but they were written by someone who was engaged with life. I looked back at them and wondered how I was able to be so calm and... alive. Now I can only find those moments when my internet connection was taken away from me - on road trip, on a plane ride. And I realize I was able to do it because I let my mind wander and present in the “now” and “here”, not someone's thoughts for 15 seconds, and another one's and another one's and so on and so for hours on TikTok or Instagram or whatever online vices you can name.

I'm in my mid twenties now and for the next 10 years, I'll be as free as I can be, with my body still cooperating and unmoored with any familial or serious responsibilities. I don't want those years to whiz by and wondering what I have been doing all those times. So here's to change, for a better life of mine.

One thing to note, Hari did mention that this is not an individual responsibility alone. We now have tech companies with billions in assets funding people whose main job is getting us addicted to their platform. More users, more attention, more ad revenue, more money. More and more and it's a wonder how my brain can scrape by each day with so much more's. I don't have the means to affect change on the legal level but I can give you my recommendation for this book. Maybe if enough people are aware, things are easier to change.

As an aside, I understand the hype around hiking now. It used to be unbearably boring for me, but I guess that's the point, to take some time off consuming things and think things through, to evaluate the current course of my life or contemplate on the events and people of my life, to have all that and see nature in all its glory. Here's to paying attention to where I want it to be again.

As I said to my friend when I was reading a book: “A sad book where the main character refuses to be sad”.

I love Demon's fighting spirits and his sweet sweet soul. Here's to all the kids out there, and those who once were.

i know its a good book when all i want to do is spreading the gospel of this book to anyone who asks

“...what he wanted to capture with his project was the feeling of time, of having been a part of something that stretched so far back, was so impossibly large, that it was easy to forget that she, and he, and everyone else, existed in it—not apart from it, but inside of it.”

i wonder what unbroken chain of lives and events that lead to my existence now. what are their hopes and longings, pains and toils that once seem monumental then, only to be lost in the distant land that is the past. A distant land where each of us has sailed forth from.

========================================
It's midnight now and my mind is whirling with thoughts of my past, present, and future...

always love when the book is narrated by the author

I dont like true crime because I don't want to hear about the murderers and how they gruesomely kill their victims. But this book does a good job of not doing that too much. The author puts the victims lives at the forefront and the appropriate context for queer life at the time.

Kinda frustrated the perpetrator didn't confess to his crimes since his victims are far larger. Oh well, at least he's in jail.

A+ Plot. Missed this about the Hunger Games.

Also I wondered why the Hunger Games is considered YA when it is so dark!! with all the deaths, head-hacking, children-hanging that are so present in the series

Spoiler review:
I was initially not too thrilled about reading a book from Snow's perspective, considering him being the cruel villain in the series. But when I started reading it I was surprised to read a sympathetic account of a kid growing up in a war zone. I kept wondering in the back of my mind how this kid could grow up to become Snow, but then it all makes sense. The constant brainwashing, dehumanization, us vs them, and the wars themselves. A book written from the Capitol point of view was a good addition to the series. I don't know if I could have finished the novel not knowing he got served his justice in the end, and the stupid fucking establishment that he represents.

I believe the same thing as Lucy Gray did, we're born to be good natured, sympathetic to our own kind. But I'm no fool to be blinded by the acts of cruelty that we might commit, heck Lucy Gray was the Hunger Games victor, in the game where the last one surviving is the one winning. But she chose to walk on the right side of that line. She might not be able to choose her circumstances, but she choose how she can act. And I hope I'll always remember that. Firm, but kind.

This is a book about:
- Beavers
- Humans' capacity for whole species extermination
- Humans' capacity for nature preservation despite the uphill battle, for the simple love love of nature and its beings
- The Anthropocene and the increasingly common clash between humans dwellers and
- How the US is not that bad in terms of forest protection

Also I'm officially a beaver believer

I will definitely read Goldfarb's next book

I wouldn't have picked up this book if it hadn't been for the HBO show, mostly to avoid seeing all the spoilers online. They are both better off consumed in conjunction with each other. The show lends some depths to these characters that the book did not, and the book provides more background details, which the show understandably leaves off to create a sense of narrative.

After the Dance of Dragons though, the book drags on a little too long, and I stopped caring since all my fav characters are not featured in it anymore. I know this is meant to be a history book but my eyes glazed over the 527th time the “author” mentioned the unreliability of Mushroom the clown...

Also i may or may have not read this out of procrastination of moving.

Fuck, this is fantastic.

very cute

yeah.... i kept being reminded that i was reading a play, with the narrators shouting monologues and explanations every five seconds. not for me i suppose.

Best male lead, with good sense and great charm.

Funny and mentally unstable heroine. Love her.

nice clean prose and wonderful dialogue, almost as if i'm reading from someone's diaries. impossible to recommend to friends tho due to the litany of explicit content and trigger warnings. 4.5 stars

I want to be young (I'm still 25) and in California (I like staying in the PNW) I want to tried coke at parties (no interest at all) surrounded by hot people (this i don't mind).

When I told people I was reading Sex and Rage, people assumes it's sexual and violent lol. While actually the “sex and rage” just means full of vitality and confidence. I really like Eve Babitz's voice, despite whether or not I like the characters in her books. They can live their own decadent lives and I can just read about it instead of having to do it myself