Matt
Alone in the stretching night. He'd wipe his eyes and climb the stairs back to his bedroom, and collapse amidst the crusted up sweats atop the mattress. He'd sleep, again. It didn't matter so much anymore whether the computer was turned off all the way, and he barely touched his dick at all.
As someone who spent quite a lot of time on 4chan in his younger years, I'm a bit impressed with how authentic the imageboard posts that fill a lot of these pages are. The hateful, edgy lingo is perfect. The homophobia, the misogyny, the nihilism, the racism, the aggression, the lack of empathy and stunted reactions to suffering... It's all there as this book really doesn't pull any punches. And it makes for a fascinating digital setting for this story about an American hikikomori, barely existing in this world while the glow of a computer screen and the gore videos on it fill his already deformed mind as he swings between his bed and desk all day and night.
This is a disgusting book that can be hard to get through at points, but it's also very clever in its presentation and really engaging in its character study.
The author manages to capture this sort of hypnagogic state where the reader is confronted with the different layers of the protagonist's existence simultaneously, similar to how one might keep tabs on different threads on a message board at the same time. The chaotic digital conversations, the depressing real life, and the protagonist's dreams and memories all fill the pages at the same time, structured with some different formatting for easier distinction.
Aside from the general atmosphere, it also makes for some effective clashing of subjects. Like, for example, when the reader follows the users on the fictional 4chan-equivalent gather to organize a really cruel harassment campaign against a random person while also reading the chatlog of a camgirl stream where an overzealous viewer tries to clumsily express empathy towards the camgirl who shows signs of self-harm.
There is a lot in here about the two-faced, twisted moralities and values of (predominantly) men who lost their sense of reality and compassion after escaping into the unfiltered depths of the internet for too long, wasting away while celebrating the suffering of others.
The main character is an interesting extreme for that and while he is just as despicable as the other anonymous imageboard users, it is compelling to read how his life had developed to end in this dark place, how his world-view formed because of that, and how he deals with inevitable change when he is confronted with it.
This is a quick read but not necessarily an easy one given many of the fringe and transgressive subject matters that take part throughout this in one way or another. But I think if you are in the right headspace to take these things on and are interested in an exploration of this sort of lost soul, then this is a surefire recommendation. This specific online subculture has probably rarely been displayed this authentically and raw in fiction.
Days passed and one night in his decorated silky throne three creatures slept. A hero in simple clothes; filled with love, happiness and gratitude. A beautiful innocent girl; in fears and doubts, and a rifle; representing a symbol of courage and righteous.
Moonzajer's translation of this novel by Khalilullah Khalili, one of the most important Afghan writers, is a bit rough when it comes to grammar and formatting, but I'm just really grateful that I am able to read this at all.
The thing with Afghan storytelling is that it comes from a culture where verbal exchange of stories and poetry is much more popular than written text and so while Afghanistan undoubtedly has a long history of poets and the kind, it's not something that was put on paper much, let alone taken across borders to the rest of the world. Reading the poetry collection An Assembly of Moths with a fantastic introduction by anthropologist Whitney Azoy parallel to this novel actually made the significance of Afghanistan's verbal culture even clearer to me and made for a perfect companion piece to this.
Anyway, given all of that, it's great to find a classic Afghan text in English at all and Khalili's A Nobleman from Khorasan definitely serves as an interesting window into the country's history.
This book is a sort-of biography of Habibullah Kalakani who was king of Afghanistan for 9 months in 1929 and is praised by many as a hero akin to Robin Hood with a rags-to-riches story as a common man on the throne.
It's even more interesting to me because Kalakani basically preceded Amanullah Khan who was probably one of the most interesting Afghan kings as he was the first one to actively attempt to modernize this very traditional country in a major way.
I actually went into this book expecting Khalili to completely villainize Amanullah not only because the story involves his exit from the throne after things didn't go too well, but also because Khalili's father was reportedly killed as a result of Amanullah's original rise to it. I was pleasantly surprised though to see that Amanullah wasn't just given all the blame for everything and, on the contrary, even was given some respect or empathy at points.
On the other side though, it's a bit hard to tell how much artistic freedom has been taken when it comes to the protagonist Habibullah Kalakani. From what I gathered, this biography has been somewhat controversial and I believe that might be because Kalakani is portrayed here as a completely fair and noble common man, intolerant to crime and injustice. But common sources claim that he has been involved in organized crime himself.
It's actually funny because when you read up on the real-life person, you can see that he was known for being part of bandit groups and eventually arrested for it. The book actually picks up on that but instead of being part of said bandit groups, in Khalili's novel he is actually stopping them, but is then framed by the feds and wrongfully imprisoned.
I'm not claiming to know which version is closer to the truth, but it's just interesting to see this discrepancy.
When it comes to the prose, there is the occasional great choice of words, though it is hard to say how much of that is Khalili's phrasing and how much of Moonjazer's translation. There are typos and syntax errors, but it's clear enough to understand what's going on.
The story structure very much feels like a story one would tell rather than write, which would make sense given the aforementioned cultural emphasis of verbal storytelling in the country. Though it's fair to note that this novel was actually written down during its conception while Khalili was living in the USA.
I think in the end I appreciate this mostly for its cultural and historical significance; for being this almost immediate glimpse into the history of this country as perceived and retold by a prominent witness of the time.
Let my heart and soulimplore spring cloudsTo spare the ant hillwhen spring rain beginsThis tiny digging is their entire world,This underground darktheir shining metropolis
I had been looking for this rare book of translated poems by one of the most important poets of Afghanistan for so long, so I was really excited when I finally found it on Rekhta, a digital library for Middle Eastern literature. I was even more excited when I realized that Whitney Azoy was attached to this project and wrote a lengthy introduction about Khalili's significance. I loved his book on the Afghan sport of Buzkashi which I read earlier this year.
Khalilullah's own son, Masood Khalili, translated the poems by his father together with Azoy, and Sohalia Khalili, Masood's wife, painted the beautiful illustrations to make this book visually impressive as well. It makes for a really cool whole.
Azoy's introduction gives more context to the culture around poetry in Afghanistan and explains the importance and popularity of verbal exchange over writing, which adds its own layer of meaning to the art of poetry because reciting it adds new life to the words as it changes and morphs through each person.
With this added perspective, it was actually interesting to recognize some of the poems in this from the other English-translated collection that I read before, The Quatrains of Khalilullah Khalili, and notice the slight differences in content.
This collection blows the other one out of the water though with the introduction by Azoy and the great art by Sohalia Khalili, both of which add so much to it.
There are a whole bunch of poems in here I genuinely liked a lot. I noticed that Khalili mentions different bugs a bunch, often with a certain respect towards them, which I personally love. Hell, the titular poem, and the longest one of the bunch, is centered completely around bugs.
I'm really grateful for having had the chance to read this and I recommend this wholeheartedly to anyone who is interested in the subject matter. This would probably make for a great first glimpse into Afghan literary culture too.
I just wish it wasn't so hard to come by. I hope at least Rekhta keeps hosting it for a long time.
We talk about sex all the time - in magazines, blogs, television series, jokes, sermons, movies, ads, fashion, podcasts, and porn. We're obsessed with sex, but who are the major brands that shape our daily experiences with sexuality? Where are the reputable, trusted voices?
Andrea Barrica's Sextech Revolution is equal part educational exploration of the corporate side of sexual health and equal part call to action to found your own start-up in the space.
The author clearly has a lot of experience in this environment and writes in a very learned way, shaped by her own work. She has a lot of very interesting things to say about the discrepancy between funding of porn vs funding of sexual wellness, the hypocritical way sexuality is hidden in education all the while a cultural shame to discuss natural elements of the human body developed, and how the strict bias against anything sexual cripples innovation and development in professional circles.
It's a pretty thin book though and I would have wished it would dive even deeper into these things. What happens instead is that Barrica gives concrete advice for how to become proactive yourself and start building in this neglected industry. I respect that and I'm sure you can get good value out of that if that's what you're into, but it wasn't meant for me. Those parts still had some interesting stuff in it but I was definitely more in it for the other themes.
Nonetheless, I can't really give this a lower rating because this is a very informative and current book about a subject that doesn't have too much literature written about it and Barrica is clearly a top candidate for sharing that knowledge.
If the corporate side of sexual health (and pleasure) is something you're interested in and you want a modern look at it, this is definitely a worthwhile recommendation. Even more so if you're interested in becoming or already are an entrepreneur yourself.
When I run over the frightful catalogue of my sins, I cannot believe that I am the same creature whose thoughts were once filled with sublime and transcendent visions of the beauty and the majesty of goodness. But it is even so; the fallen angel becomes a malignant devil. Yet even that enemy of God and man had friends and associates in his desolation; I am alone.
I'll be honest, I went in with rather low expectations. The story of Frankenstein has never been one that particularly interested me and I had a feeling this book would probably not carry the same weight today as it did when it was first released. Not because its themes aren't relevant anymore, but because its themes are something that has been explored a ton throughout art by now and isn't as novel anymore. I wasn't sure if this book actually dug deep enough to wow a reader in the 21st century.
I was curious to see if I'd be surprised though and I like the backstory of how Mary Shelley came to create this story after all.
I agree that Frankenstein opens up some great moments about existential themes, the relationship and obligations between a creator and its creation, the concept of innocence and blank slates, the fear of the strange, the burden of consciousness. The creature's suffering was definitely the most intriguing part of this book for me. Victor Frankenstein himself was pretty awful as a character.
In general, the way people throughout the story react to and treat the creature is very over the top and ridiculous in a way that I don't think aged well. Victor's own inner struggle is also often hard to empathize with, in my opinion.
And of course, there are things like the way the creature learns to travel all across Europe and learns to speak sophisticated language so quickly is a bit odd even in the context of this story.
I also can't really say if I find it strange and corny or really innovative that the story is told through all these different accounts from different characters. I mean, at some point we're reading letters in which someone describes the story of someone listening to someone else tell their story in which they listened to someone else tell their story. The layering in this is ridiculous sometimes.
The prose can be a bit repetitive and dull at parts too. Mary Shelley loves to get distracted by describing landscapes for a couple of pages at a time. But there are moments of great prose with really powerful and effective words as well. The final speech by the creature actually hit me a bit.
Overall, I enjoyed this though. It's not a terrible read and it had some engaging and interesting moments. I don't think I'm ever gonna be a big fan of the Frankenstein concept though and that's more because of my personal preferences and less because of the quality of this text.
"What's the point? Everything is just an illusion anyway.""Illusion?", Peter repeats."Exactly. Everything is an illusion. The entire world. We are all just a herd of sleeping animals, having a bad dream. But I will wake up soon!"
(Quote translated from German.)
Growing up, I was obsessed with this children's/young adult mystery book series called The Three Investigators. It's interesting how this series originated in the US, but was way more popular over here in Germany where it was dubbed Die Drei Fragezeichen (transl. The Three Question Marks). I'm just one of many who grew up with these and there are still kids nowadays that read these book and listen to the audio play versions.
I had a whole bunch of these books and audio play tapes as a kid. This one, The Mystery Of The Invisible Dog - or Die drei ??? und der Karpatenhund which is the title I always knew it as - was one of my absolute favorites in the series. I only had the audio play version of it back then though so this is the first time I actually read the book.
I think what made this one of my favorites back then and what I still really like about it on this late revisiting is that it's a really nicely contained story that's taking place in a single neighborhood for 95% of the time. So a lot of the book is focused on getting to know the residents of the place, learning about their individual relationships, and having the main characters surveil the area while all sorts of odd things go on. It makes for a pretty mysterious atmosphere. I think that vibe came across especially well in the German audio play adaptation I listened to as a kid but it's also here in the book.
The prose is of course a very simple language given that this is a children's book after all but the investigated crime is unravelled in a pretty clever way and it's giving a lot of genuine clues for the young readers to figure things out themselves before they're revealed. There is an element about sleepwalking that's stretched a bit much but otherwise the story is wrapped up well. The way the titular dog comes into play, which is missing and searched for throughout most of the book, is still a simple but very clever reveal that I remember impressed me as a kid.
Reading this as an adult now doesn't make it as suspenseful as it was when I was a kid for obvious reasons, but I still think this is probably a highlight in this series and a good read for younger audiences.
Let me just exist with you, happier than ever.
I've been looking forward to Elliot Page's autobiography for a while. Not only are transition experiences always interesting to read, I also was really curious how that might affect the life and career of an actor. This book gave a really good insight not only into Elliot's private life but also what parts his acting roles played in this journey. It was actually a bit surprising to me to read which movie productions were the ones to empower and motivate him.
Elliot tells his stories unchronologically, jumping through childhood, adolescence, and adult life, looking at family dynamics, love life, and Hollywood career. It makes for an engaging whole not only because of the personal insight into this man's journey of self-acceptance and gender expression, but also with the added bonus of background stories and interactions with other industry stars.
Read this book and then have a double-feature of Whip It and E.T..
Latisha may have thought magically about her own gender, but the myths of gender under which the adults in her life operated are much more pernicious and less attuned to the realities of gender than Latisha's fantasies. Those myths: that gender is binary, and that any deviation from that binary is wrong, and bad, and dangerous. And that it was Latisha who represented the danger and not those who sought to stop her, fully and finally.
This certainly wasn't an easy book to read. Both because of the heinous hate crime at the center of it as well as the philosophical concept that can be a bit challenging for someone like me who isn't very well-read in those things. It makes for a thorough and interesting analysis of human behavior though.
Gayle Salamon extensively analyzes a transphobic hate crime to recognize how the situation got to that point by following the philosophical thread of phenomenology which focuses on the structures of people's individual experiences and how our consciousness processes our world.
It might sound a bit abstract, as philosophy often does, but it basically looks at how something like unquestioned “common sense” can dictate destructive behavior, how the way we automatically project subjective meaning to neutral objects changes how we interact with them, and how the way we talk about things puts the blame on a victim faster than one might think.
The whole court case is pretty vile. Plenty of the quoted words from the court proceedings are shocking and makes you wonder how these teachers can even still hold a job at a school afterwards. There is unabashed victim shaming all around, sometimes under a thin veil of care. Gayle Salamon does a good job at taking their behavior apart, dissecting the biased contradictions, and showcasing how a non-existent threat can develop through biased interpreting of someone's neutral surroundings leading to a skewed attempt at “protecting” one party from another.
Rest in Power, Latisha King.
Some of the most remarkable things about Latisha King's short life was her resilience, the way that she persevered in her self-expression in the face of normative regulation and prohibition. She emerged, and persisted, in defiance of all the different forms of violence directed at her, with the aim of extinguishing her very being. She was not crushed into submission by the insistence, by family and teachers and peers, that she was impossible, that she did not exist - though all these forms of violence did exact their price.
I've rebelled against the grave that was meant for me. I deserve to die in the mud with dignity like everything else. I deserve to die next to the woman I love.
May Leitz's second novel is a lot more sincere and personal than Fluids was. There are still plenty of similar themes and subjects, but Girl Flesh goes into a less pulpy direction and instead focuses more on character growth and incorporates some self-reflection of the author.
The two main characters are arguably two pieces of Leitz herself and many of their plights and hopes seem to mirror the author's own personality to a degree. The one being a musician and the other an online micro-celebrity writing about horror and/or true crime.
As a content creator herself who has spent hours researching, discussing, and analyzing true crime, gore media, and grimy fiction, May Leitz explores what that might do to a person through the characters in her book. The guilt of participating in making a spectacle of someone else's suffering, as well as how these stories fuel the growing fire to fight injustice. The book also takes on the unique experience of being a secluded person experiencing small-scale fame and all the parasocial relationships that come with it. Subjects like childhood trauma through a problematic household and transphobia are also subjects that pop up. Many of which are probably at least partially inspired by personal experiences and it makes for interesting character building in-between the gruesome violence.
It's also a fresh breeze of air to get a story like this, filled with and inspired by so much despair and suffering, that's spearheaded by two women with a genuinely harmonious relationship, ready to fight. It is satisfying to see them empower each other and demand a better future for themselves while refusing to succumb to victimhood.
This was a very fitting follow-up to Leitz's first book and I'm looking forward to where she's going from here.
Nervous, edgy, extremely emotive in daily life, I have a tremendous reserve of calmness and aptness as soon as it's a question of carrying off a dead body. I become another person. I'm suddenly a stranger to myself, all the while being more myself than ever. I stop being vulnerable. I stop being unhappy. I reach a sort of quintessence of myself; I fill the task that fate has destined for me.
The Necrophiliac
